The Death of a Child

This last weekend I attended a funeral for a 7 year old girl. She was 2 months older than my son. I don't know this family very well. I know of  them from my  homeschool group. I wanted to support the family so I attended the funeral.

 The little girl was born with a rare condition. Her first two years of her life was filled with surgeries. The following five years of her short life were healthy and no major problems except what was expected of her condition. She was not able to talk, or walk. She came down with phenomena and her body couldn't fight it off. Now she is with the Lord.

While I was listing to the eulogy it hit me how drastic this families life is going to change. During the eulogy the Pastor talked about all the therapy like speech, occupational, physical therapist, and all the endless Dr. appointments. The endless medication everyday making sure it was on time. This family has other children also. I am sure like me with such a busy schedule they homeschooled the other kids in the various medical facilities like I do.

 Losing a child is drastic to anyone. A child with special needs has another type of lose. I guess it's something you truly can't understand unless you have a child with special needs. Even if we know that it is a reality that this child will not have a long life.

It hit me how much her life is going to change. Her life literally came to a crawl. No more hectic schedule of going to appointments and therapy. No more homeschooling in the places while your waiting. No more endless phone calls to Doctors.

 I know for me that my life is hectic. I literally have five appointments every week that part of our normal schedule. That doesn't include our doctors, and specialist that get thrown into the mix.  I have such dear friends at those appointments that are part of my weekly life. We cry together. We pray together. We laugh and rejoice in accomplishments of each others children. We understand what most others do not understand unless you have walked our road. We are so busy that we have learned that it is okay if everything doesn't get done. We are just literally tired all the time.

I just could not imagine losing a child and losing a life that keeps me so busy that I want to pull my hair out. Now this family has to adjust to such a drastic change in there life. My heart goes out to this family who had to bury there little girl.

I know that there are families who can relate to this life that keeps us so busy but yet it is so fulfilling. We have met some amazing people.  I would of never have met these people if it wasn't for my child having medical needs. I have been blessed seeing the world through the eyes of my daughter that I might of not seen if it wasn't for her teaching me. She is so innocence of the world around us. She sees God in away that is just awesome. She teaches me its okay to cry, to feel broken at times and to feel its all spinning out of control.

Most of all because of my daughter it has made me closer to my Savior. Thinking back to all the times I have spent crying and on my knees to Him. Praising Him for the accomplishments. Repenting when I have lost my temper or patience, or been so angry at a doctor. Or angry at a  person who has insulted my family because of ignorance or just assuming they know what's best for my daughter. The list could go on. I am truly grateful for my daughter and her special needs. She has changed me in so many ways and made me a better person because of it.

I'm pretty sure this family has been changed in so many ways over the last seven years. Listening to the pastor talk about The family I get a sense that they have grown closer to each other and in there walk with the Lord.